STUCK IN THE METAL

dark side of the moon

2010-09-26T11:05:00.001-07:00

lots of changes in the past couple of months. i dropped the ball and, once again, didn't update like i said i would. oh, me! i promise to do better next time. really.

i'll keep this short, since it's 8pm on a sunday night, and i'm in Prague. as in, Prague, Czech Republic. that's right. so why would i want to be stuck on a computer typing a pointless music blog i've barely managed to keep alive for the past 4 years? yeah, that's a true fact. four years of stuck in the metal... go figure.

anyway, since i am here experiencing the amazing magical wonders of eastern europe... falling in love, eating weird food (corn on pizza? cucumber salad? don't knock it until you've tried it. it's great. really), exploring caves, touring the finest dive bars and punk music venues that the czech republic has to offer... i've also had the chance to check out some rad music from across the sea i probably wouldn't have heard otherwise... music like this awesome fuzzed-out indie rock band SAADE. they are a killer two piece (drums/guitar) that just released their first full length debut "You Are Coming Home" earlier this summer while touring the US in support of BORIS.

check out the only song i can find of their's on youtube:

"Coming Home from the Czech Republic based rock band SAADE's first full length album release "You Are Coming Home." A dirty, blues-based indie garage rock band with as many riffs planted in metal as pop-rock influenced hooks, their debut album is an aural journey into the depths of the heart and the perils of the mind."

good, huh?

click here to download the album:
http://saade.bandcamp.com/album/you-are-coming-home

and, if you get a chance, you should also grab their demo EP (released only on cassette tape - how cool is that?!) produced by the legendary Boris drummer Atsuo. check that out here:
http://saade.bandcamp.com/album/first-demo-ep

SAADE on myspace

until next time... sbohem!

no direction home

2010-07-06T16:26:00.001-07:00

it's been a while since i've posted here, and in the two years that have passed, some major changes have occurred. to be completely honest, i was tempted to start a new blog altogether, but for lack of a better name and because i still hold a special place in my heart for my ideas and what i was doing on here, i've decided instead to revamp and redesign the old stuck in the metal into something new.

this will still be a music blog, and it will still be me, lyndxe, posting on here. this time around, though, i will be expanding into some other areas, cataloging my adventures and keeping things a bit more up to date with what's going on in my world. this blog was starting to sound a little too much like buddyhead anyway, and let's face it, there really only needs to be one buddyhead.com.

july 24th marks the beginning of a month-long tour for me across the US + Canada, with the genre-hopping japanese experimental band Boris. i'm really stoked!! i will be posting my adventures on here, since i am sure a month with these H.M.A.'s (Heavy Metal Addicts) will keep me firmly stuck in the metal.

BORIS' "Statement" from the album "Smile" (available on SouthernLord.com)

check out info on the new Boris collaboration with Ian Astbury (of the cult/doors fame!!) along with a list of the 2010 summer tour dates by clicking here.

see you all soon! xo)))

i'm feelin' supersonic

2008-12-03T14:52:00.000-08:00

as most of you know (since i already txted the six of you that read this shit, anyway), i got to meet NOEL GALLAGHER yesterday when homeboy stopped in at amoeba. we got to interview him on camera about what he was buying. yeah, he introduced himself as the bass player for coldplay ("obviously"). yeah, he said T-Rex was "prolly shite." yeah, it was kinda one of the coolest things ever.
yeah, you'll get to see the "interview" on amoeba.com soon.

IN THE MEAN TIME... i'm gonna FINALLY see oasis for the first time TOMORROW at the staples center. FUCK YES! who's going? don't lie. you know you love it. HELLO! YOU GOTTA ROLL WITH IT!

i have to find someone who wants to get "liam" to match the "noel" i'm gonna get tatted in huge old english lettering style on my stomach before the show. just kidding (maybe not). in any case, this is gonna be a party you can't stop. who would WANT it to? noel is ALWAYS cooking on a solid 8.5 out of 10. he even says so himself: click here to read.

and finally, 'cos i think this story is funny and i really want to make the most of this pointless blog: my neighbors got super bummed 'cos i was blasting oasis "too loud, too late" last night. um, it's hollywood and it's fucking OASIS. are you old or something? IT'S JUST ROCK 'N' ROLL!

i'll tell you anything, baby 'cept the truth

2008-11-11T14:01:00.000-08:00

it's no secret a swiped my blog name from the eagles of death metal cover of the stealers wheel song "stuck in the middle." i was supposed to interview the dream boys themselves a couple of days ago for a bitchin' article i was gonna write... but boots electric was a no-show/call. i get it, they're on tour. things get weird. but i can bet it probably wasn't 'cos he was sleeping in. i mean, sometimes it's tricky keeping everything in your life straight, especially when your little black book probably looks a little something like this:

1. baby girl #1
2. baby girl #2
3. baby girl #3
4. baby girl #4
5. friend of baby girl #3
6. baby girl at amoeba
7. baby girl at big wangs
8. blonde baby girl
9. goth baby girl
10. tatted up baby girl
11. boy baby girl
12. baby girl on the corner of santa monica & la brea
13. old baby girl
14. baby baby girl
15. baby girl with an english accent
16. baby girl in chicago
17. baby riot grrrl
18. alabama backwoods baby girl
19. baby girl baby momma
20. baby duck

etc.

somewhere on that list is probably "baby girl that i'm supposed to do an interview with on 11/11 at 9am" but maybe my number was cross-filed under a different baby girl. oh well. shit happens. i'm supposed to do an interview with "the devil" and his cohorts (for real) sometime in the near future, so if you've got any ideas for good questions you think i should sling his way, e-mail me.

one of those dudes from buddyhead told me to ask jesse hughes about the buddyhead podcast... which just made me wonder, "uh, what podcast?" is that just gonna be a couple of burnouts and their fair-weather friends spinning tracks and shooting the shit about ol' dirty bastard, creedence clearwater revival, and the verve? couldn't ya just go to one of those fifty nights that those dudes are djing instead? prove me wrong, boys, and make that shit worth it! bring the good stuff back. i know i'm not alone when i say we miss the good ol' days when you used to "go OFF" (and not be lame about it). do it!

at least rivers cuomo is still rad, even if the last few weezer albums have been little more than weird experiments in the field of how popular can we sound while still looking like total dweebs? market. regardless, there were some choice cuts on his last solo release alone: the home recordings of rivers cuomo, and i'm hoping to find at least a few gems on his follow-up that's due out on november 25th (same day as GnR's chinese democracy, dudes!). if nothing else, everyone needs to own this album for the cover art:

fuck yes. and i thought my haircut was ridiculous.

seeing as how it's almost time for the impending release of the loooooong awaited "chinese democracy" (even though everyone who's anyone has heard it already), i figured i'd take the opportunity to correct a few douchers who don't know that when you abbreviate "guns n' roses" it's GnR not GAR. they are not "guns and roses" anymore than "rock 'n' roll" is "rock and roll." besides, GAR is too fucking close to that shit/piss/hair metal band "GWAR." let's not taint the genius that is "appetite for destruction" with thoughts of old dudes wearing masks and spewing shit into an audience of blind sheep who paid wayyyyy too much because they can't/won't/don't admit that it's OVER. wait. fuck. which band was i referring to again?

most people who know me know that i'm a little... weird. i'm a social retard half the time, and stoned as fuck the rest. comes from a rebellion towards a weird religious upbringing and getting beat up a LOT in my younger days. but if there's one thing that will always get me outta my shell, it's dylan (if you've been here before, you already know this). my buddy lionel recently attended a show of his up in victoria, bc on october 23rd, and since i spent my last dylan experience in santa barbara tripping balls on mushrooms and puking on the dude in front of me (which if you're reading this, i'm sorry, man, but that shit was INTENSE), i thought a real dylan show review was warranted. especially since this one seemed like such a unique experience. it offers a real insight on just how much this man is still capable of:

"Show was incredible. His keyboard wasn't working so he sang Man In The Long Black Coat center stage, just Bob and his harmonica. Later, when the keybord wasn't working again, he picked up a guitar and played Just Like A Woman. He spent about two minutes fiddling around aimlessly on the guitar before he found the song. It was terrible, or should have been, but I was in awe of it. Only he could pull that off. He's completely peerless.

The entire thing was miles above and beyond even my raised expectations. When other artists of his age and stature play their "timeless hits", it's entertaining but there's something false about it. Dylan tosses any nostalgic bullshit aside and re-invents the songs from the ground up. He's singing them how he fucking FEELS like singing them. Like he's singing them for the first time.

Bob is at his best whenever he's doing what he wants. The only low-points in his career have been times he's compromised or let other people take control of his music. As long as he's doing whatever he damn well feels like, it clicks. And it did last night."

awesome, lionel. i'd be lying if i said i wasn't jealous. wish i could've been there for that one.

for as much as i love dylan, i also have a soft spot for neil young. and since i'm as connected as much as the next neo-folk poseur hipster wannabe, i thought i'd link to an article i read recently about dylan visiting the canadian songwriter's home in winnipeg. click here to read.

does anyone know anything about the old LA punk band "butt trumpet?" i just picked up a 7" for the single "i left my flannel in seattle" from the album "primitive enema." thing is, that album is way out of print, and yeah, even though i work in the world's largest independent record store, there's a few things we don't see here too often. if you've got a copy of "primitive enema" let me know.

and last but not least, amoeba interviewed my old buddy casey (who most of ya know if ya know me) for this new feature on the site called "what's in my bag" (make sure you check out the mos def one, too) anyway, i took the pictures, and homeboy has some great suggestions if you've got taste, so check it out. i remember when we were teenagers, hanging out in the parking lot at hastings, and i told him about "this amazing band called my bloody valentine." we went inside, and i made him go grab "loveless" and that was that. friends ever since, and we've only tried to kill each other a couple times over the years. rock on, bro! now you're famous!

darlin' don't you go and cut your hair

2008-11-10T00:06:00.000-08:00

my week, in pictures.

listened to some stuff:

cut my hair:

ate a ton of spaghetti:

found the best thing ever:

fuck yeah, rock on.

i'm the freak that's on display

2008-10-25T16:50:00.000-07:00

i decided to put my cat iggy up on youtube. he's the one who made a cameo in the last "stuck in the metal" video blog entry i posted. he's weird, funny, and i love his ugly little face. plus, he knows what's up better than most people out there. see for yourself:

woooo! rock 'n' roll!

yeah, i know, i need to get out more...

creed SHREDS!!

2008-10-23T17:03:00.000-07:00

seriously. watch for yourself:

thanks to pia for sending this one to me. i've added it to my never-ending supply of scott stapp and creed vids i keep stashed under my bed. including the one where he's wasted and talking about how "babies come from his sack" (a personal fav):

maybe i shouldn't be so harsh. after all, scott stapp is a poster boy for "rock" music and christianity. kids should really follow his "righteous" example by putting their belief in hookers, blow, shitty music and oh, yeah, jesus, too. see what i mean? this dude has managed to reach "the top" despite spraying hypocritical bullshit from his ass and turning every musical endeavor he takes on into a fucking joke. plus, his "unique" singing voice makes him sound like he's juggling fat, hairy nutsacks around in his mouth while getting rammed in the doodie hole by the lead singer of nickelback. i mean c'mon, what's not to love?

touch me i'm sick

2008-10-21T13:05:00.000-07:00

in honor of halloween, i wanted to post possibly one of the best music videos in existence for any holiday, ever. warning: it is amazing.

wow.

and if you haven't heard about it already, the little radio in downtown LA is hosting a halloween party THIS halloween. autolux and the henry clay people are set to play, which should be rad in the face. it'll set you back 24 bucks, but there's a free open bar all night. YEAH! you'd spend that much on just two drinks at some lame scenester spot like cinespace anyway, PLUS you'll be getting tons of rad music... and did i mention the free open bar? shit yeah! i think i did, but it's worth mentioning again. you can get yr tickets by clicking here.

Album Review: Oasis Digs Out Your Soul

2008-10-13T10:44:00.000-07:00

Oasis have returned from the vacuous depths of rock ‘n’ roll, overcoming sibling rivalry and wildly ostentatious lifestyles to release their seventh studio album, “Dig Out Your Soul.”

The record instantly hypnotizes the listener with it’s own take on the Beatles-laden psychedelia sound, while simultaneously planting it’s stamp on the ever familiar brit pop genre. Reminiscent of their earlier work, “Dig Out Your Soul” is an album that reaches heights that one wouldn’t expect from a band that’s been in the game this long.

Staying true to their precious form, “Dig Out Your Soul” can almost instantaneously be labeled a classic. The real truths give way to swaggering rock songs, touched with a smattering of bombast that true fans have come to rely on. The first track on the album, “Bag It Up” pulls the listener in immediately; the lilting melody passionately vying for your attention.

Reflecting an inner peace for the Gallagher brothers - without losing any of the braggadocio that made their music (and personal lives) so entertaining, the polished music is still laced with sounds of nature and every day life, eliciting memories of 1995’s "(What’s The Story) Morning Glory?" However, unlike previous albums, Noel carries the reigns on the majority of songs. Liam takes over on vocal duties for only three of the eleven tracks that comprise their latest release, including the first single “The Shock of Lightning.”

What’s unique in this album over previous work is the focus and attention on more of a riff based songwriting style. An array of musical authors gives their sound a new perspective, while still managing to maintain the classic rock ‘n’ roll hallmarks that the brothers have always brought to their music. Songs like “The Turning” and “To Be Where There’s Life” channel psyche-influenced Beatles tunes, not unlike those found on “The Magical Mystery Tour.”

The boys have managed to firmly cement themselves in the vast world of rock ‘n’ roll by striking a balance; effortlessly maintaining their unique sound, while still keeping a watchful eye on a fickle industry. On the whole, the album is a more mature Oasis, one that’s been through the worst and made the best of it. The attitude remains the same, but the songs don’t. For instance, “(Get Off Your) High Horse Lady” sounds like John Lennon got together with Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds and wrote a ballad specifically with the intention of having Oasis play it. Not exactly a tune you would expect to hear on their earlier releases.

Salty sweet lyrics, playful bass lines, swooshing guitars, and catchy hooks make it easy to slip inside the eye of your mind and get lost for 45 minutes in your own private oasis. From start to finish, the stalwart brit-pop kings have done it once again by doing what they do best: making music to “Dig Out Your Soul.”

Oasis will be playing the Staples center with Ryan Adams and the Cardinals on Thursday, December 4th.

that's your boyfriend

2008-10-08T18:59:00.000-07:00

that's your boyfriend. because it is.

have you ever seen some dude walking on the street with a HOT naked lady that's bending over tatted all up on his arm? he's toothless, homeless, and probably dickless. he's got an old cup from jack in the box that's full of dog shit and used condoms. dude. that's your boyfriend (ak/a tyb). don't you remember? we'll post a picture of him up on our new (old) blog, so don't worry. you'll remember when ya see him.

this was a weird photo/video blog i started ages ago, and completely forgot about. that's kinda how my life goes. i just can't seem to shake some shit, and before i know it, there's something i forgot about that's on my radar again and back in my life. so (for now, anyway) it's baaaaack. kinda like fire and ice. i'm into it. i've got ADD; it helps keep things interesting. and this time i have a new friend to help me with it, so it's gonna get some much needed attention.

and for the dudes: don't worry, we'll be sure to post hot-ass babes up, too. tits, man. tits.

bookmark it!

http://thastsyourboyfriend.blogspot.com

and if you feel like reading some of my *actual* writing that isn't about dylan, touching dicks or ugly people, you can check out my beatcrave articles.

down the highway, down the tracks

2008-10-08T11:15:00.000-07:00

bob dylan does it for me. i love the man, and i've never even met him. i don't have to. i get everything i need by hearing his music and reading about his life. i've had the fortune of seeing him live twice now, and each time it's played an integral part in shaping a major psychological shift in me. his albums have gotten me through the most melancholy periods of my life, shedding light on situations i didn't even know were hidden to begin with. he was there when i was 7, riding in the car with me and my mom while we sang his songs from highway 61 revisited. he was there when i experienced heartbreak, and emotional distress, spinning tales of forlorn lovers and troubled situations. he made me feel like i wasn't alone, and gave me a connection i could relate to. bob dylan changed my life, more so than any other artist or musician. he did more for me than anyone ever could: he gave me shelter from the storm. somewhere to go when i couldn't deal, and i needed comfort.

i know i'm not alone in my affection for this man and his genius. his ability to go beyond generational gaps and have his words and sound be as pertinent today as they were 40 years ago, is a feat seldom accomplished by few. he is an iconic pillar that is as strong as granite, but as soft as sand slipping between one's fingers. his own life and vast musical catalog have painted a picture of a man, not unlike the rest of the world, flawed in his perfection; a man who has made mistakes but also made it through. a person who has transcended genres and labels to become an iconic artist in the true meaning of the phrase. simply put, he is a man who had a story to tell. and that he has.

of course, i've been eagerly anticipating Tell Tale Signs: Vol. 8, the latest chapter in his vast career-spanning bootleg series. it features new tracks, live cuts, demos, rarities, and previously unreleased goodies from 1989-2006. it came out yesterday, so make sure you pick it up if you haven't already.

one of the tracks on volume 8 is called "dreamin' of you." if you're a hardcore dylanologist, you've probably been streaming the album for a couple of weeks now on his website and have already heard it. today, i stumbled upon the music video for this new track, recorded at the same time he was penning the rest of the tunes that ended up on 1997's Time Out Of Mind. it's amazing, and the video stars harry dean stanton. you've done it again, bob.

and just because i'm feeling it, here's dylan live in 1976 singing "idiot wind" with the infamous rolling thunder revue (from NBC televised event of "hard rain"):

you'll find out when you reach the top
you're on the bottom.

Don't Go Into The Light!!!

2008-10-08T05:20:00.000-07:00

If all this so-called "Christian Rock" from the likes of The Jonas Brothers and their ilk is the sort of music they'll be blasting beyond the Pearly Gates when it's time to give up the ghost... I think I'll just keep on sinning to make sure I'm not there...

you just kinda wasted my precious time

2008-10-06T22:56:00.000-07:00

i don't have much to say right now. i just wanted to post some of the videos i'm into watching on youtube. so i'll get right to it. enjoy:

DAVID BOWIE - "Life On Mars?" directed by Mick Rock

BAUHAUS - "All We Ever Wanted Was Everything"

THE CRAMPS - Garbage Man

JESUS & MARY CHAIN - "Teenage Lust"

BOB DYLAN - "Don't Think Twice, It's Alright" (Dont Look Back outtake)

obey your master

2008-10-06T20:36:00.000-07:00

the other day, i met these two fourteen year old kids who came into the record store i work at. they were SUPER stoked on metal. i was helping 'em pick out the coolest tool and metallica posters, and ended up getting into a huge 15 minute conversation about all things metallica. these dudes knew all about the new album, death magnetic and kirk hammett, plus they wouldn't stop talking about how "kill 'em all" changed their lives the first time they heard it (that was cool, it changed mine too). at the end of it, i gave them some free shirts, and they were totally pumped. these little dudes knew more about the history of the music than 99% of the axe weilding adults that call themselves fanatics. the younger one told me that he was gonna call me sometime at the store so we could talk some more about metallica, but he had to go 'cos his dad was getting mad that he was taking too long. i hope those kids grow up and start a rad band and give music the kick in the nutsack it's been needing for a while now. i mean, the only one out there that's really fuckin' killing it and sayin' what needs to be said right now is this guy:

i may be 22, but i have the sense of humor of a fifteen year old:

idiot.

watch out, you might get what you're after

2008-10-03T23:39:00.000-07:00

i'm a little out of sorts tonight because i had to work and miss the david byrne show at the greek. i guess showgasm '08 (as it's come to be known) must have some downtime. i suppose it's all for the better 'cos i can barely hear anything anyway after the mind blowing face melting shit yeah awesome rad-ness that was my bloody valentine last night at the santa monica civic. showgasm '08 is far from over, though. it continues with sun o))) next week at safari sam's, and then wire at the echoplex... and did i mention OASIS?!?!?!?! my life is awesome, and i have the raddest friends ever.

i'm going to work on a podcast or another video blog entry tomorrow, so be prepared, ya lil' eager beavers. i'm all about expanding the multimedia experience here at stuck in the metal. that is, assuming of course, that i can tear myself away from this video for five seconds and do something "productive":

your southern can is mine

2008-09-30T17:42:00.000-07:00

i've got ADD, so i can barely sit through most movies without getting ultra bored ultra fast. in all honestly, i don't give a shit about the latest Bond flick, and i sure as hell can't tell you the name of the dude that plays 007 in the films these days.

all i know is that when i heard that alicia keys and jack white were collaborating together to create the new theme for "Quantum of Solace" i was curious (and a little scared). anyway, the music video for "Another Way To Die" came out a couple of days ago, and i finally just saw it. check it out:

i'm actually kinda diggin' it. i'm not saying i'm gonna rush out and buy the latest alicia keys record, but for what it's worth, could be worse.

i've been a motherfucking dope machine

2008-09-29T22:15:00.000-07:00

drugs. there are good ones. there are bad ones. some blow minds, others just blow. either way, the "unholy trinity" of sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll wouldn't be complete without them.

drugs are the wild card; the element of danger. they have the ability to inspire tremendous amounts of creativity within, or ease the pain of harsh day to day realities. however, they can also just as easily destroy that which they were meant to enhance. it's only natural that artists and musicians would be drawn to them; the promise of relief from a troubled existence or a journey through time and space is tempting for those looking to escape the confines of everyday human existence.

check out this video clip that documents syd barrett high on acid:

kinda trippy to see a founding member of one of the most influential psych-prog rock bands in history really in the thick of it; hangin' out in the middle of nature climbing around on rocks and playing with butterflies and stuff. y'know. before he was like that all the time.

anyone wanna go to the joshua tree desert with me and take drugs? wait, scratch that. i'm afraid you might do something like this chick:

yeahhhhhhhhh! wooooooo! E-TARDED!

i really don't like emo kids. in fact, i can't stand them. they're fuckin' pussies. they cry. they listen to bands with sentences for names. and worst of all, they whine about it to anyone that'll listen. i can't wait until that "trend" dies down and jared leto goes back to acting (do yourself a favor and don't click here.)

then again, maybe i'm not understanding enough. i mean, life MUST suck when you're a pussy with a dick. especially if you're this dude:

chicks like dudes in bands 'cos they AREN'T YOU. they're doing something. not stuck in tex-ass making whiny limp-dick "video blog rants" about why they can't get any play with the ladies (btw, are you sure you're not gay?). oh and for the record, pussylips, that's not "the fuzz." that's "mall security."

finally, please feel free to donate to the "lyndxe needs money for rent this month because she wasted all her cash on tickets to go see Oasis play in NYC for a show that ended up getting cancelled anyway" fund. it's pretty self explanatory (click here for the link). or you can just buy me a ticket to go see oasis at the staples center in LA on December 4th (they go on sale this wednesday, 10/01, but the presale starts tomorrow and the password is: OASISINET). either way, that'd be real rad. thanks, champ!

i'm never too sick to fight

2008-09-29T14:28:00.000-07:00

i'm pretty sure josh homme is the biggest badass in "rock 'n' roll." it's all about the fuckin' swagger and attitude, and this dude's got 'em both down pat. oh yeah, and he's got massive talent to boot. what more could ya ask for? yeah.

go back to your mom's house, you twelve-year-old dickless turd.

Concert Review: Eagles of Death Metal Make a Bang

2008-09-28T23:52:00.000-07:00

here's a review i wrote on the eagles of death metal show at the mayan in downtown la on september 25th. i recently submitted this to beatcrave.com, but i thought that given the band and my blog, it'd be worthwhile to post up here, too.

On September 25th, an eclectic crowd gathered at The Mayan in downtown Los Angeles for the final show of the Hives/ Eagles of Death Metal/Willowz tour. From scenesters and seasoned followers of local indie faves the Willowz, to the savvy black and white clad Hives devotees, everyone in attendance was poised for a night of musical magnificence.

Among these contrasting fan-bases was a smattering of tattooed greasers and leather clad vixens, huddled in select groups throughout the venue. They casually sipped on cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon, occassionally stopping to take a drag off of their cigarettes. It was obvious that these seasoned rockers were anticipating a different vibe than that of their alt-indie and garage pop bretheren. Plain and simple, these folks were here to rock 'n' roll. And rock 'n' roll they would, to the hip shakin', boot scootin' boogie woogie sound of the fast-paced desert rock band, Eagles of Death Metal.

It was just after 9pm; the Willowz had already finished warming up the eager audience, as more and more folks started making their way towards the stage, anticipating the next act. The house lights dimmed, and instantaneously an explosive cheer erupted from the mouths of young and old alike. The moment everyone had been waiting for (whether they knew it or not) had arrived.

Guitarist "Darlin' Dave" Catching appeared first, appreciatively nodding to the ladies gathered at stage right, as bass-player Brian "Big Hands" O'Connor moved towards the crowd huddled at stage left. As the stage lights flashed on, eager EODM fans' were surprised to see not only Joey "The Sexi Mexi" Castillo sitting at the drums, but that directly parallel to him, perched above his own set of skins, was none other than Queens of the Stone Age frontman, Josh "Baby Duck" Homme.

Suddenly, the masses exploded into a fit of cheers a second time. Frontman Jesse "Boots Electric" Hughes sauntered on stage in all his devilish glory, extending his left arm towards the crowd, his fingers tightly clenched together in the undisputed rock 'n' roll statement of the century: the devil horns. There were no two-ways about it. The Eagles of Death Metal had landed.

After "Boots Electric" (ak/a J. Devil) himself finished adjusting the familiar lightning bolt strap of his solid white Gibson Les Paul guitar, the band immediately launched into "Don't Speak (I Came to Make a Bang!)" from 2006's Death By Sexy.

Teeny boppers, biker punks, indie hipsters, and rockabilly riders were all overcome by the same wave of thrashy, trashy and fun-filled rock 'n' roll that bounced over everyone in the audience. Young and old were joined together like toe tapping, hip shakin' dance demons. It was impossible to keep still as the face-paced gritty garage rock swept through the halls. Playing tunes from each of their three studio released albums (including the upcoming "Heart On" out on October 28th), the band seemed to mainly focus on tracks from their 2004 debut "Peace, Love, Death Metal" while introducing the crowd to new songs like the deliciously debauched "Anything 'Cept the Truth" and forthcoming "Heart On" single "Wannabe in LA."

J. Devil lived up to his "Boots Electric" moniker, boot scootin' and hippy, hippy shakin' his way up, down, on and off the stage, pausing only to express his undying affection to "all the lovely ladies" in the audience. The feeling was mutual; halfway through their set, an anonymous pair of navy blue panties were flung on stage. "The Devil" quickly nabbed them, presumably adding them to his growing collection.

The crowd continued dancing hard throughout the rest of their cherry cola flavored set, giving shouts of adoration for "the dream boys," and, of course, throwing up their own devil horns. As the band collectively burst into the catchy riffs and buzzing hooks of their final song, the fast-paced "Speaking in Tongues," the boogie woogie moving and grooving intensified. After the final notes were played, the band collectively stood together to take a final bow. A simple "thank you" and "goodnight!" was uttered as they exited the stage. The roar of the audience continued to echo throughout the Mayan as the stage lights were dimmed.

Some stayed to watch headliners the Hives; others left after having had a sensory overload of watching the musical embodiment of sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll, known unforgettably as the Eagles of Death Metal.

The dance party of the century (well, at least the night) had come to a close. Regardless, one thing was certain: the dream boys were here and they made us smile.

it's hanging above you

2008-09-28T12:10:00.000-07:00

that's right, kiddies.

i shot/edited/posted a video to youtube today that highlights what's on my musical radar 'cos i didn't have anything better to do. actually, that's a lie, i have about a million and five things that i gotta do that probably should take precedence over making a shitty youtube vid, but i didn't really feel like doing any of them. plus, i'm pretty sure the only people that care about what i'm listening to are me and my mom, and she's just doing it to be nice. thanks, ma.

this (obviously) wasn't scripted; i ran back and forth to my cd towers and started pulling things out, and this was the result. it's a lil' choppy at some points and i forget what i'm saying towards the end, but you get the idea.

rock 'n' roll!

The Sermon On The Mount

2008-09-27T17:56:00.000-07:00

Wednesday night, September 17th, 2008
The tickets had made themselves available at the last minute. And now, like a lamb to the slaughter, I was led to my paddock just a breath away from the left lip of the gaping maw of the beast known as the Hollywood Bowl. The balladeer of blood, broads and bullets was in town to sell his snake-oil sermon of death and impending doom. This was to be my first attendance at Mr. Cave's sermon on the mount. I was to share the paddock with two hapless foreigners from the Queen's country who reeked of cologne and were sporting golden brown perma-tans, one of them having been in attendance of this type of service before. "He's the real deal", said the one on the right.
Within minutes of my arrival, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds strolled onto the stage to uproarious applause from their followers and kicked things off with Night of The Lotus Eaters, followed by Dig, Lazarus Dig!!! and Tupelo...They were very well obviously off and running. Three songs in, and they weren't taking any prisoners. I eyed the foreboding crimson numerals 60:00 off to stage right, hiding behind the monitors. What did they mean? I didn't care.
Just then, Nick Cave addressed his flock: "Hello, Los Angeleez! This next song is a song Hollywood made famous." The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end as the resonating bell of fate tolled for us all through the immutable strains of Red Right Hand!!! A very personal favorite, evoking some of the darkest imagery ever laid bare in song. I grinned from ear to ear as fire and brimstone filled the air.
To calm us down for a couple minutes, Mr. Cave sat behind his piano to sing about a former lover. A song both so beautiful and subtly unnerving, "Into My Arms". Check it out if you haven't already. Great stuff!!!
Just around this time the crimson numerals off to the side had already begun counting down!!! I now knew what they meant, but I didn't want to accept it. A few more songs in and Cave and the Bad Seeds put us through our paces with Deanna, a song about cum and blood and guns and murder and moths and frocks. Alot to take in, but no one said this was a pansy-ass Josh Groban concert!!!
Song upon murderous song assaulted and groped us, yet made us squeal. So intense was the attack that I spotted Mr. Cave briefly run to the side of the stage on a couple of occasions to huff on some much needed oxygen. After all, the preacher-man stayed in his suit for the whole show. At about the time the crimson numerals read 5:30, Mr. Cave said "It appears we have some time issues, so we'll pretend that you've already asked for an encore." This being said, the band ripped into Hard On For Love, an obviously romantic song about life-long passions and what-not.
But nothing could prepare us for the motherfuck-laden saga of the motherfuckin' bad-ass
known as Stagger motherfucking Lee to bring this sermon to a close.
There had been mirth, there had been mayhem, and there had been murder. A full course meal for all us sinners in attendance. We filed out of the Hollywood Bowl and into the Los Angeles night in search of tales such as the ones we had just been told. Either as witnesses or participants. Only time, and our wicked minds knew for sure...

Say You Ain't Gay, Clay!?!

2008-09-24T17:52:00.000-07:00

The world of rock n' roll was shaken to the core with the revelation to end all revelations. Clay Aiken, musclebound hunk and masculine troubadour to ladies near and far, revealed to the world that...(you better take a seat if you aren't already)...HE IS GAY!!! Horror of horrors! How could he have lied to us for all these years!?! Has he no compassion for his millions of fans!?! What of his "Clay-mates"!?! His adoring female fan base cried and cried into their pillows long into the night, having the one true love that emerged into the limelight of celebrity via an absurd teevee show (American Idol in case you already forgot) plucked from their very bosoms. If you thought midwestern women already had weight problems to begin with, news such as this can only lead them all back to their kitchens and Krispy Kremes and KFC's and McDonald's (you get the picture) in ravenous multitudes in search of comfort foods by the fistful!!! This world is so full of lies!!! How can we ever go on, knowing that an artiste such as he was pulling the gay wool over our eyes this whole time!!! First Freddy Mercury, then Rob Halford, then Rosie O'Donnell, then Ellen Degeneres...now CLAY!!! Who's next, Barry Manilow or Johnny Mathis??? Let's pray not, for the love of God, let's pray not. There's nothing wrong with being gay, I just cannot endure the emotional trauma which is a result of getting lied to again by celebrity. I'll put the pills away for now...The pain shall subside in time...Deep breaths...Deep breaths...

Abandon All Hope

2008-09-24T17:36:00.000-07:00

It's been said there's safety in numbers. Well, dear friends and enemies (mostly the latter)...now you've got two to contend with! Watch this space, star-crossed lovers. There's more to come. All over yer face!!!

Life is short, filled with stuff

2008-09-24T12:33:00.000-07:00

i'm super amped on about 3 cups of green tea right now, listening to the cramps, and feeling word vomitous (yes, i just made that one up). i got pretty much no sleep last night 'cos i was working on finishing up my article for the music site beatcrave.com

speaking of which, i'm now a regular contributor to beatcrave.com and i'm going to shamelessly plug myself because i can, so check it out.

i went to the brant bjork show at the echo last night after i got off of work, sliding in just moments before the man that used to pound the skins for kyuss took the stage. i'm still reeling from some serious mind-blowing desert rock. if there's one thing that gets me into it, it's watching those dudes from the desert finger fuck scales like catholic school girls.

sebastian bach has shitty music, but i have to respect anyone that jumps out into a sea of people and starts beating the living shit outta some fuckface who thinks it's cute to throw a beer on stage. what's up with all these douchebags harassing artists? if you don't like the heat, get out of the kitchen. no one is forcing you to go to the show, and hey, guess what? the door is always open, so you can leave if it turns out it wasn't what you were expecting. just make sure not let it hit ya on the way out.

finally, since i'm lazy as fuck, and also because i seem to be incapable of updating on a regular basis due to my commitment issues (yeah, even towards my own blog), i've invited my very rad friend, john d, to start contributing. yay! it's a party on my blog and everyone's invited! except you.

your music's shite, it keeps me up all night

2008-09-15T15:40:00.001-07:00

there's a lot of reasons why "married with children" by oasis is one of my favorite songs. it's beautifully written, and within the masterfully crafted prose and lilt of the melody, lies a completely familiar message that nearly everyone can relate to on some level. there's no hint of malice, contempt or ill-will with what's being said, rather simply put, it's a lack thereof. an exercise in apathy. makes me wish i'd written it, and in that moment, the realization of their true genius comes to light.

of course, this clip wouldn't be complete without noel's trademark attitude surfacing before the song begins:

i was supposed to have seen oasis on friday night at terminal 5 in nyc... but shit didn't turn out because some douchebag decided to jump on stage and push noel into his monitors. this resulted in noel bruising his ribcage and caused several dates on their tour to be postponed/canceled, including the very private, ultra exclusive date i had tickets to. fuck.

at least i got to take a picture of sid vicious.

there is nothing conceptually better than rock 'n' roll...

2008-09-05T15:54:00.000-07:00

as is kind of apparent in the way i sporadically update (seriously, 8 month breaks?), i'm really lazy. this prolly should've gone up sooner, but in any case, here's a review i wrote of a darker my love show i went to (um, kind of fairly) recently.

On August 7, Darker My Love wrapped up a Los Angeles residency at the legendary Troubador in celebration of their sophomore release, '2' (out now on Dangerbird records!).

Tim Presley's veiled vocals blended in smoothly with the psych-influenced guitar that emanated from him and rhythm guitarst Jared Everett. Their shoegaze-twinged sounds traveled effortlessly through buzzing vintage amplifiers, creating an unparalleled array of blissfully alternative fuzzy jams, while Will Canzoneri fleshed out their choicely harmonious tones with an thought-provoking flair on the organ and clavinet. Drummer Andy Granelli (of the Distillers fame) and bassist Rob Barbato (doubling up on vocal duties) kept the rhythm steady with resolutely undulating beats. While mostly a showcase of soon-to-be classic tracks from their latest release, the evening wasn't without a splash of old favorites from their 2006 self-titled debut album. Even with a fledgling discography, their performance seemed to float onward throughout the night as the crowd was enveloped in a wall of sound that carried through the walls to keep hipster hips swaying and indie heads bobbing.

In a surprisingly open-handed gesture, Darker My Love and Dangerbird Records decided to offer all concert-goers a copy of '2,' serving only to further cement their fan base's unwavering support. After having just experienced the surging swell of billowy dream pop tunes in one of the permanent fixtures of LA's vibrant musical past, it can only be assumed that everyone in attendance was poised and ready for a listen of the album on the drive home. It's easy to immediately be swept into a world of whimsical neo-psychedelic fun upon the first listen; the ease in which the album flows from start to finish is a true testament to the band's future as musical troubadours of their own right.

be sure to come check 'em out when they play amoeba hollywood on october 2nd. wooo!

no fun, my babe, no fun

2008-09-01T11:11:00.000-07:00

i'm feeling lazy and uninspired, so here's a video of a cat playing the theramin.

rad.

caring is creepy

2008-08-25T12:27:00.001-07:00

recap of the last 6 months or so: i'm playing music, starting a band, going to rad shows, smoking weed, eating vegetarian, and all while i still manage to keep my day job at amoeba. don't hate me 'cos i have a life and am too busy hangin' out at shows like the jesus and mary chain, melvins, duke spirit, gang of four or health. or 'cos i get to hang out and meet rad people like johnny greenwood and tony hawk. mmmhhhmm

i got tickets to go see my bloody valentine this october. i'm about as psyched as it gets. aaaaannnnddddd, we're gonna go see nick cave/spiritualized/cat power at the hollywood bowl in a couple of weeks... STOKED!

speaking of amazing killer jams, i got my face melted off with some serious heavy doom drone experimental stoner rock with boris at the echoplex on august 3. seriously killer. earlier this year, i had the fortune of gettin' paid to take pictures of 'em at their special after-hours in store performance at amoeba berkeley in june. that show was the start of their US leg of the tour; the skull crushing stoner jams and distorted billowy drone blended together seamlessly in a gaussian blur unparalleled by any other band. just one look at their pedal board is enough to get any gear-head's dick hard.

got an hour? fuck, man. spend it watching this:

...dude.

stoner metal got it's first real kick in the nutsack in the desert, though, with generator shows. those dudes in kyuss would get AMPED and play for 17+ hours in the middle of NOWHERE for a bunch of desert rats who were all about getting FUCKED UP. awesome...

like josh homme said, "if ya weren't there, well... ya weren't." unfortunately, i wasn't counted among the lucky few that got to experience that kind of insane mind blowing rock. prolly 'cos i was like, 5, and eating fruit loops and drinking apple juice outta my sippy cup. so? wanna fight?

anyone wanna buy me a ticket to go see dylan play in santa barbara on september 7th? pleaaaaase? i'm so broke from buying gear that i can't even afford to buy a new pair of chuck taylors and my old ones are literally falling off. i don't care 'bout the soles on my shoes, though, just another chance at seeing dylan deliver his stories to an audience as diverse as his career catalog. at the very least, his new bootleg boxset "tell tale signs" that's coming out october 7 is enough to keep me satiated for a little bit. it's the eighth volume in the bootleg series that features rare cuts and unreleased demos from 1989 through 2006.

recently, i've been delving into the depths of rock 'n' roll, trying my hand at the whole "band" thing. given me a sort of drive to hope for better than just helping hipsters find neutral milk hotel albums on vinyl and crackheads who want donna summers cassette tapes. i love my job, for sure, 'cos i get to take rad pictures and listen to cool music all day, but having to deal with my latent control issues makes me wanna do something where i get to call the shots. 'cept in a band, that's not really the case 'cos we're all doing that. and yeah. money, schedules, equipment and creative issues occur ALL THE FUCKING TIME. we're trying to document the process on video and in pictures, and take advantage of the youtube phenomenon so everyone can watch as we flounder around on deranged synths and anti-climactic lead guitar parts. which then turn into petty squabbling and passive aggressive attitudes amidst frustrated kids just trying to get what we've got in our heads out on tape. YEAH! SHIT IS HARD.

last saturday, i went to the natasha shneider benefit show at the henry fonda. are you kidding? qotsa? pj harvey? jesse hughes? tenacious d? i was stoked, 'cos that's right down the street from where i live in hollywood, so i got fucked up ala "feel good hit of the summer" style before heading down without having to worry about the fuzz killin' my buzz. i knew the evening was gonna be laced with somber moments, but i wasn't prepared for the intense emotional outpour that came from every musician that graced the stage. i almost can't even put into words what it was like seeing pj harvey belt out some of my personal favorites from the desert sessions with queens of the stone age, the unofficially undisputed champs of rock 'n' roll. needless to say, it was one of the best shows i've ever experienced, and, like natasha shneider, won't soon be forgotten.

as seems to be the case when i update here, i'm going through some weird crazy shit right now. being grounded by dylan is always a huge comfort, but lately i've been listening to oasis, too. more specifically their sophomore album "(what's the story) morning glory." i've always loved and listened to them, but the time has now come where their music is starting to affect me. it's rad to be forging connections within the words and walls of sound. i've always been a "layers" kinda kid, really delving deep into a record and listening for all the subtle nuances that bleed through the more prominently featured leads. basically, i guess that means i value the production, and let's face it, oasis are fuckin' masters at it. it's those moments of lucidity where i really connect with something musically that makes all this shit worth it. my point? GET INTO IT. the truth is you gotta go back to go forward. if you can find out where you're coming from, you'll figure out where you're supposed to be.

cast no shadow - oasis (acoustic performance with noel doin' vocals, live on msn):

...

goddamnit, metallica, please release a good album this time around. i'm really sick of disappointment from you fuckers. st. anger sucked st. nuts. little less fisting each other one-off style, and a little more pissing each other off, yeah? thanks. even dave grohl's got your back on this one. i think nine inch nails is taking a leaf out of metallica's book, though, 'cos they used to SLAY it back in the day, but now, for the umpteenth time this year, they've released an album that no one really cares about. i don't know why people are always up on a high horse regarding sobriety, since some of the best shit i've ever heard comes from destructive substance abuse and chaos.

oh, and in case you are fucking blind and couldn't already tell just by lookin' at the guy, henry rollins will kick your ass:

spacemen 3 are wrapping me up in this song right now, so i'm gonna go burn a j and fuckin' get into it, bro. i swear. i'm gonna post more. ahhh, say it ain't so...

it's truly a lie, i counterfeit myself

2008-01-17T19:07:00.000-08:00

so my laziness caught up with me and i haven't updated in about 5 months. shit's been kinda weird lately, and i kept meaning to update, but meh. i started smoking more weed than snoop dogg, and i can't remember shit these days.

i've been pretty fuckin' sick for the past month, in and out of doctors' offices battling my rapidly declining health. it's cool, just proves my theory that shitty people get what they deserve. yep, i'm admitting it folks, i'm a shitty person and i totally deserve whatever's comin' to me.

aaaannnyyyway, enough of my self pitying at the shitty hand that i've been dealt in life. the bed rest has given me lots of time with my 800+ cd collection and my rad little stash of totally sick bud, but naturally, as in times past, when shit gets to me, the only thing that i can identify with is dylan. i think i've watched "no direction home" at least 5 times in the last week, and listened to "blood on the tracks" at least 3 times a day for the past month. the music and the drugs, man. whatever gets ya through the night.

i guess nothing really cool has happened since i disappeared from the virtual world. manson and twiggy reunited, nick cave and the bad seeds got together and recorded another album, and amy winehouse is in worse off shape than any of us. yeah, i got tickets to go see manson at the wiltern in february. yeah, i'm stoked. yeah, i'm gonna totally goth out.

so lemme get down to brass tacks. there ain't nothin' left in this world for you or me, babe, and almost all record reviews are just a way to show the world how cool you are, or how much you know about something you don't even like. i thought that 2007 on the whole was a bust. i started off the year doing shit i didn't wanna do, and ended it with people i didn't wanna be with. least we got a couple of good records from it, and i personally learned that drugs (like psychedlics and weed) are cool.

so what was worth it for me?

era vulgaris - queens of the stone age

i don't care if josh homme calls mark lanegan over to come take a shit in tandem with him, records it, then adds a killer bass line to it and pow! releases another lil' nugget to the world for all us to hear. it's fuckin' killer. i saw 'em a bunch this year, hung out at a few shows, and talked mad shit on how rad this album was to anyone who would listen. plus, they added that dude from wires on fire to their ever changing rotation of bassists since nick went off to do lots of blow and create knock off qotsa renditions to a bunch of fat overheated porkers at ozzfest.

from the opening line of the opening track "turnin' on the screw" to the rollicking repetitice chorus in "sick sick sick" and the simplistic bass intro to "suture up your future," this record does little wrong and a lot of right. do yourself a favor, get fuckin' blitzed and blast "i'm designer" 'til your cunty neighbor bitches at you to turn it down at 3am. guess they don't teach rock 'n roll in the midwest, bitch. fuck yeah!

smokey rolls down thunder mountain - devendra banhart

i was late coming in on the devendra banhart love train. yeah, i'd heard of the guy, knew he had a hippie beard, weird tattoos, and sang about seahorses and sparrows, but other than that, he stayed off my radar. that soon changed when i heard this record and realized that there was more to this guy than hippie crystals and a mat of long hair. plus, the dude totally owned jim morrison's old couch and let a bunch of dogs chew it to fuck. how's that for rock and roll? do yourself a favor and get into this record. he's supposed to play a show at the hollywood bowl sometime around my birthday this year, anyone in?

health - health

what the fuck is this? it kinda sounds like throwing a pot full of hot water and silverware down a stairwell and recording the ensuing chaos. the songs are short and pointless, but fucking great. they sort of blend experimental with shoe gaze and straight up prog rock. plus, they're playing with autolux on feb. 1 at the el rey.

mirrored - battles

i had a weird discussion about this record with matt groening and his son. we all agreed it was a departure from their earlier records (duh, hey added vocals this time around), but more so than that, it was and evolution from their earlier work. see? i can name drop too. look at how fuckin' cool i am and the people i have cool discussions with. plus, the video for the song "atlas" was one of the best music videos of '07.

in rainbows - radiohead

duh. everyone loves radiohead, and everyone loves to contemplate suicide while listening to kid a on repeat. the progressive release of the album digitally made 'em even more popular amongst indie hipsters who like to think they're part of a bigger plan to make the world a better place by saying things like "well, it's a good thing they released it themselves and added the 'pay what you feel' diatribe to the world. they really are fronting a musical revolution." farrrrrt. hey, dickbag, your pants are tighter than mine and i think that's causing the blood to rush away from your balls and into your brain. if you ever wanna have little kids named after cities in europe, you better loosen the lock on your tighty whities and let those balls hang down. radiohead did what they felt like doing, and out of practicality for whatever reason, just threw the tracks up online for whomever wanted 'em and said "fuck it." yeah, record labels suck a fat nut now, but once upon a time, without 'em you wouldn't have heard a fraction of the bands you like out there 'til the advent of file sharing and myspace.

baby 81 - black rebel motorcycle club

this album helped me to realize that i like making out with girls AND boys. 'nuff said.

grinderman - grinderman

...and so did this album. i've been raving about this record all year, and i ain't gonna stop in 2008. nick cave slays it in whatever form he chooses to take. grinderman is just another continuation of the "nick cave: australian badass" saga. anything this guy touches turns to a deeply emotional river of dying, pain, and sorrow from the depths of your innermost soul. this is album is a little more "upbeat" at times than let's say, anything on boatman's call, but that's not to say it's lacking any depth or character. who hasn't felt the twinge of the "no pussy blues?" yeah, that's what i'm saying.

icky thump - white stripes

jack slays with his axe twice as hard as before, and meg pounds furiously on the skins, trying to keep up. fortunately, it works, and every bit of blues revival and southern influence on this detroit duo seeps through each track like oil sliding through the gears on a factory assembly line.

war stories - unkle

as if james lavelle didn't do enough for the music world by discovering and signing dj shadow to his label when the kid was only 18 years old, he starts his own band, and starts churns out rad collabs with bands like radiohead and queens of the stone age, too. if that wsn't enough, he decides to go out to the middle of desert, presumably do a lot of drugs, and call up a few folks you might've heard of, like the duke spirit, autolux, ian astbury (of "the cult" fame), and yep, you guessed it, everyone's favorite stoner rocker, josh homme to come out and jam. every second of this album is pure fucking gold. i had the fortune to see 'em a few times this year, since i'd heard that he'd added a full backing band to support him on tour. yeah, those shows blew my mind. i spent each time fully baked, so i might be a little partial when i say seeing them perform live was one of the single best musical experiences of my life.

so of course with the good must come the bad, too. since there was a particular lot of mediocre and all around basic garbage in '07, i've decided to water the "worst of" down to shit that could have been good, or was at least done by musicians that have more than proven themselves in the past to be talented and worthy of being defined as an "artist."

white chalk - pj harvey

we get it. you had a couple of abortions, nick cave wrecked your area for a while then stopped, and you got super bummed out and sat down at a piano to write songs about it while dressed up like a victorian seamstress. please go back to singing ambiguous songs about sex and love while screeching about the emotional pain you're subversively seeking and continually setting yourself up for. we liked that polly jean harvey much better than this third-rate tori amos knock off. blech.

year zero - nine inch nails

i'm sorry, i didn't hear this album. i was too busy farting. oh wait, i didn't miss anything? wait, you mean that wasn't me farting? that was the record? fuck.

back to black - amy winehouse

okay, so technically released in 2006, this album didn't get "big" until nme started writing articles about how she got so drunk that she puked on stage somewhere in london and stumbled around in a coke haze at coachella. i'm sorry, but shitty tattoos and songs about various substance addictions are soooooo 1994.

american doll posse - tori amos

in addition to being a contender for one of the worst album titles of 2007, when i stopped cutting myself in my twenties, i stopped listening to tori amos. somehow, she still manages to stick around and find the underground group of lesbians who are still anxiously awaiting another ani difranco album and a more intellectual form of "pussy power." over it. so, so over it.

eat me, drink me - marilyn manson

hey mr. superstar, please stop now. every step you take musically leads you further and further away from the brilliance of antichrist superstar. somehow, you've managed to make a parody out of yourself AND ruin any shred of "evil" servitude and anarchy on the world you once held. newsflash: no one's shocked, anymore, dude, so give it up. no thanks.

so there you have it folks. the best and worst of 2007. i am still alive, and i am still gonna post on here, deal. so here's to 2008; to the hope that we will finally see the release of gnr's chinese democracy, a new my bloody valentine record, another year of keith richards continuing to slay it despite all medical , oh yeah, and a much needed shot in the arm to rock 'n roll. come on, dudes, let's make this one a year to forget!

where is everybody?

2007-09-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

so, lately i'm pertty bummed. my car got towed, i'm so broke i'm on the ramen noodle soup diet, i have a massive migraine, and i just spent a week in southern utah. shit sucks, i'll deal.

moving on, rhino just did a reissue of closer, unknown pleasures, and still on rad 180 gram vinyl. check that shit out!

while you're waiting for your order to arrive, watch joy divison slaying "dead souls" live in 1979 at the apollo theatre in manchester. the sound sucks, but fuck it, it's live joy division.

it's fun being young, depressed, and surrounded by a bunch of happy tan people that are stoked on the new kanye album. fuck yeah!

i wanna know if you can hit it and quit it

2007-09-19T09:47:00.000-07:00

there's nothing much worse than spending a couple days in eastern washington, 'cept for maybe a few days in southern utah... which is where i ended up instead of my intended destination of spokane.

since there's nothing to do here 'cept "climb some rocks 'n shit," i've been listening to 7"s and LPs until my ears bleed, reading books on phil spector, and watching james hetfield and tony iommi slay queen's "stone cold crazy" on youtube. fuck yeah!

i love metallica. they kinda lost me on that "st. anger" crap, but i'm pretty sure the only people left liking that greased up fist of shit were those die-hard homo-fearin' beer guzzlin' fucktards who are really into that new beaver-metal sound (see also: hell yeah). in case you're wondering what "beaver-metal" is, figure it out. pansy ass pussy "metal." get it? kinda annoying, kinda gross, kinda boring. sorta like white trash beaver, ak/a the majority of their current fanbases.

anyway, loooooong before lars started his campaign to rid the world of file sharing and back even further from when hetfield set the bottle down for good, they used to stack hot bitches like pancakes every night backstage when they were on tour with guns 'n roses. check out this clip of hetfield reading (and burping) axl rose's ridiculous list of backstage demands to promoters across the world.

fuck yeah! but hey, if you churn out a fucking masterpiece like "appetite for destruction," i guess you're entitled to your faggy ham cubes.

right now i'm watching "american hardcore" for the upteenth time, and after rolling around in fits of laughter over the concept of moby even attending a punk show, much less actually performing in one, i've been looking up rare performances by some of the bands featured, and getting that special tingly feeling between my legs while watching some of these dudes lose their shit on stage.

check out this awesome footage of the misfits covering black flag's "rise above" live in boston circa 1980something.

face full of black soot

2007-09-15T13:51:00.000-07:00

i think a bunch of people watched the mtv vma's last week, but i'm kinda out of the pop music loop, so i missed out. sucks to be me... not. even though i didn't tune in, a ton of people kept sending me text messages telling me to "check out britney spears' performance" from that night on youtube. well, i kinda don't give a shit about what or who britney is doing or not doing, so i haven't watched it. but here's a link if you wanna check it out. basically i heard she kinda puts no effort into it, and she lacks any stage presence. wait, how is this different from her entire career so far? riiiiiight. and, hey, america? there's a reason her initials are "b.s."

so anyway, i was at work, doing cool shit, when someone mentioned the vma's (which is unusual since we're all so cool, hip and indie that anything mainstream is usually shunned with waspy quips and a curled lip), and britney's performance was the topic of conversation. my ADD was kicking in and i started to zone out, when i heard that some kid from the middle of nowhere basically filmed himself having a meltdown 'cos people "won't leave britney alone." i'm always more than interested in people making complete assholes out of themselves on youtube, so naturally, i checked it out:

i love it when emo doucher kids freak out over pieces of already been chewed bubble gum pop princesses. i may wear a lot of black eyeliner, have pale skin, and a general disdain towards humanity, but i don't even remember the last time i cried, and i haven't purposefully tried to hurt myself for a while, so guess that means i'm outta the running to be an emo kid.

moving on from shit, i've been listneing to a lot of cool music recently. one of the dudes i work with turned me onto a cool group called the troggs. i dig their 60s garage rock monotone voices. anyway, you've heard 'em at least through their hit song entitled "wild thing" that the jimi hendrix experience famously covered. you may also recall that hendrix had more success with bob dylan's "all along the watchtower" than the actual songwriter himself. don't get me wrong, hendrix was wicked rad, but i like dylan loads more, so i kinda feel all geekily protective of his original version.

but anyway, back on the troggs, check out this awesome promo video for "night of the long grass" circa 1967. these guys did a lot of short films to their tunes (music videos?) before music videos were even really around... it's not as groundbreaking as the d.a. pennebaker's visual companion to dylan's "subterranean homesick blues," but it's still pretty rad:

the troggs are fucking awesome.

i'm gonna be in washington starting next tuesday for a week. i really don't know what else to say about it, so i'll just leave it at that. let's just say it's gonna be a loooooooong week. e-mail me if you wanna hang out and do cool shit. i'm open.

walk into the sea

2007-09-07T09:52:00.001-07:00

this fall is shaping up to be the best concert "season" i've seen in a long time... there seems to be a never-ending train of rad bands that are out on tour right now. i'm really super stoked on seeing the jesus and mary chain again at the wiltern, queens of the stone age at the nokia ginorma-dome, pj harvey at the orpheum, u.n.k.l.e. at the echoplex, and a fucking ton of awesome bands at this year's vegoose festival... all in the course of two weeks at the end of october. fuck yeah! too bad i gotta miss richard ashcroft pulling his head out of his ass and laying down some cool shit live with the verve in november. ah well, there's always next time, right? RIGHT? whatever, i've got urban hymns on vinyl, so i'll just slap that mofo on and stare at the verve poster above my bed, and it'll basically be the same thing as being there. yeah, i'm really just that lame.

the verve playing "the drugs don't work" live on later... with jools holland

doesn't get much better than that...

...well, except for the rumor i heard that's been swirling around. the story is that my bloody valentine has been confirmed to headline next year's coachella fest. this is kinda bizarre to be hearing about right now since it's just the beginning of september... and i'm still not fully recovered from last year's desert activities. but if it's true that mbv is reuniting and playing, look for me hanging out at the polo field about 3 weeks before the festival actually starts.

btw, kevin, get on it and make a new record! at the very least work on remastering some of the original issues or something. $70 for the "out of print" you made me realise ep at amoeba is ridiculous, even if you're someone who works there and gets an awesome discount (see also: me). we don't wanna hear anymore non-mixes of bow wow wow's "i want candy," so please just get on with it by calling bilinda up to see if she's down with lubing up the ol' windpipes and laying down some new tunes with you (hint: she probably is).

anyone down to go see low at the troubadour with me? i got an extra ticket for their show on the 29th of september (saturday)... e-mail me if you wanna go.

check 'em out:

you can pay me back by buying me a rootbeer float, or by helping me deface bright eyes stickers:

i fucking hate bright eyes.

rock my hole

2007-09-04T08:12:00.000-07:00

i just finished watching the rolling stones' documentary "gimme shelter" last night. between the hells angels starting a fight on stage with mick jagger to all the hippies frying their brains out on 'cid at 9am, i was hooked. the best part was when mick was walking out of the trailer and POW! he gets popped in the face by some derranged dude and gets a bloody nose for it. shit, son!

the new mindless self indulgence live dvd comes out next week (sept. 11), entitled "our pain, your gain." i couldn't be more stoked. loved and known these guys for a long time, and their live shows are unreal, so it'll be nice to "relive the experience." it's been fun to watch 'em evolve from an underground band that a bunch of dorks who play halo in their mom's basement listened to. now they're out on tour as the emo draw of the summer at "projekcdt revolooshun," headlining alongside stinkin' park and my chemical bro-mance.

check out the trailer, that, while poorly cut and consisting largely of a 15-year-old audience, is still rad:

remember he 90s? msi has been around longer than half their fanbase is old:

that reminds me: hey, emo-kids with rainbow colored dreads? thanks for putting kool-aid in your hair to make it all those wicked sweet colors. those shows can get really hot and sweaty when you're in the pit, and sometimes you get really thirsty. thank god that you're there to save the day with your colorful sweaty ropes made of hair. all i gotta do is reach out, put my cup underneath your carefully crafted 'do and squeeze. yeah, it's a little diluted, and kinda salty, but that's good, right? like gatorade or some shit?

while msi are outrageous live performers, they're no gg allin. as much as i love east coast punk, i could never get into gg. lyrically, his music is kinda garbage. the dude gets naked, plays with his vienna sausage a lil' bit, then takes a shit on stage and eats it. he randomly grabs chicks from the audience and forces 'em to blow him. he's got some really shitty tattoos. i'm not feelin' it. but hey, dee dee ramone was into it:

i recently watched the most popular film in the vast library of dvds available on gg's live performances, the aptly titled "hated." kinda funny how the director todd phillips, went on to direct "old school," the remake of "starsky & hutch" and my personal fav, "road trip." it's also kinda funny how he started off filming steaming piles of shit and continues to still do that.

rolling stone magazine redeemed themselves a few weeks ago when they put the original lineup of GnR on the cover and featured some cool articles about the creation of "appetite for destruction." this week, the cover features maroon 5 and an article with axl wannabe, scott weiland. needless to say, that's just brown.

you would know

2007-08-31T22:24:00.000-07:00

it's no secret that i adore queens of the stone age. and yeah, it was prolly for the best to see bassist nick oliveri pack up his coke and leave (see also: kicked dragging and screaming to the fuckin' curb). their new bassist, michael shuman*** (of wires on fire fame) has picked up the slack most recently, filling the gigantic void left upon nick's departure. queens still slays it, but something definitely changed when oliveri left.

in the early days, there was some good shit when nick and josh were paired up together, and scarcely has one seen better back cover art than on the first queens of the stone age record where nick oliveri (sporting a shirt emblazoned with the word "cocaine" on it) and josh homme (wearing a "D.A.R.E. to keep kids off drugs" vintage tee) are situated on either side of a chain link fence. get it? oh, and not to mention that great lil' ufo in the top right hand corner. RANDOM? check it out.

aaaaaanyway, recently, nick's kinda gone off the deep end, and hate to say it, but mondo generator sucks a fat nut. ozz fest, nick? c'mon, man, you gotta know shit ain't goin' too hot when you're giving it all up to sharon.

remember when kids thought creed was cool? i seem to distinctly recall some dudes in eastern washington with baseball caps who definitely wanted to lube up scott stapp's righteous staff. here's nick oliveri (with josh homme and chris goss) giving everyone the real skinny, no holds barred style, straight up on music "today" (which, incidentally isn't much different from that of 5 years ago).

"staind is just brown." fuck yeah, dude, i'm gonna start saying "brown" when something is SHIT, too, so i can be cool like the guys in qotsa:

memo to all the douchebags who think it's "cool" to jump up on stage and throw up the "rock 'n roll horns" while walking around "strutting" their shit in front of the band: YOU'RE IN THE FUCKING WAY. no one paid to see your drunk ass haphazardly fall across the stage in a drunken stupor (unless you happen to be the lead singer of the icarus line). you're not in the band, and you probably never, ever will be. you're killing it, bro, and not in the good way. do everyone a favor, go back to the lawn section, smoke a "doobie" and listen to the music, while enjoying it from where you belong: in the fucking audience. until you're up there headlining, get off the fucking stage.

i'm posting my podcast prolly later tonight or tomorrow... whenever i get around to finishing it. i'm still pretty new at this shit, so it's not going to be of the highest quality, but i can promise some rad bootlegs and cool shit to listen to if you're bored.

in the mean time, i'm gonna go back to eating these really fucking rad chips called "rap snacks." seriously. these are the fucking real deal.

***side note: what the fuck is up with the trend of putting up terrible pictures of people on wikipedia? we're not all photogenic, but jesus christ, doesn't have to be a contest for dorkus of the year. he's not a bad looking dude, but you snap a pic of anyone whose really trying to nail a part on stage, and they aren't gonna look like a contender for the cover of rolling stone.

main offender

2007-08-18T23:06:00.000-07:00

alright, someone forgot to protect their wireless with a password, so i'm actually writing this from the comfort of my own home. until someone wises up, i'm free to steal bandwidth to my heart's desire.

now, i gotta be honest. i'm not a fan of the swedish indie alt wankers the hives. tonight, however, i feel i've found a new respect for these pre-processed swedish meatballs.

as usual, i was randomly perusing through youtube clips, and stumbled upon this amazing little gem of the hives doing a covers medley which includes everything from the incomparable saul williams' song "list of demands" and swedish garage rockers the hellacopters "(gotta get some action) now!" to the white stripes "seven nation army" and three six mafia's "stay fly." everything about these douchers makes me wanna pour a beer on their head and kick a little mud on those fake alligator leather shoes they sport, but not until they launch into their own original music (that's 6m 31sec into the clip, though. make it that far, you've seen the best, pass on the rest).

does anyone remember when buddyhead used to be cool and actually talked about cool shit you could understand and could relate to (or at least laugh along with)? reading their latest gossip just seems like a string of inside jokes from the nin tour bus in netherfuckville, europe that no one gives two shits about, 'cept those fat goth girls that wanna get boned by aaron and need to trade in their multiple personality disorders for eating ones. in all reality, though, they're really just using aaron to get to travis.

for now, i'm gonna go back to listening to a bunch of rad black flag demos and watching pre-courtney kurt slay it on a bootleg copy of a nirvana show in austria circa 1989. FUCK YEAH!

i was a teenage hand model

2007-08-14T10:02:00.000-07:00

i've been bad. not just bad, but negligent. i'm sorry to the two people that are reading this. i haven't updated. though my excuses are just that, merely excuses, i can only say what i've said before: i can and will change.

busy as i've been, i've still managed to find time to attempt skateboarding, join the population of mac users crash b-list hollywood parties, and meet cool people... all while working at my incredibly rad job at amoeba and wasting every last cent on cd's, 7"s and books on the doors. by the way, yep, i got to see paul mccartney play live at the "secret amoeba show." yep, i was three feet away from him during his entire set. yep, i got to witness his soundcheck. yep, i got paid. yep, it was awesome. yep, i'm gloating.

more and more recently, i'm working on experimenting with creating a podcast. yes, just another pop-culturally infused idea that will soon fizzle into obscurity once i find something else to keep me occupied for a few weeks. stay tuned for that shit!

some celebrity just walked into get coffee at the cafe i'm hanging out at on the next block down from where i live. i have no clue who it is. whatsoever. i think it's victoria beckham because there's about 5 MILLION papparazzi buzzing around, and she's got a british accent. and she really looks like she could've been a spice girl. this is especially great because i'm huddled over here in a corner, it's barely 9am, and i literally rolled ut of bed to come down here and steal bandwidth. if you see me in us weekly please feel free to laugh at my ugly mug looking even shittier sitting next to some hot chick.

and since it wouldn't be an entry without some youtube action and a few of my shitty recommendations:

the only "new" album i've been stoked on recently is the bad brains "build a nation" record. check that shit out, dr. know and the rest have still got it, way over 20 years later. no burn out or fade away here, dudes!

other than that, i've really just been in regression: literally (click to see which albums i'm listneing to). i find comfort in my bob dylan bootleg series, the cream box set (ginger baker knew how to go off!), nick cave, black flag, the talking heads, and my bloody valentine. doesn't get much better than this.

being one of the few people left on the planet who actually still buys records and keeps them (is it weird i find comfort in seeing my 500+ collection all lined up on a shelf just waiting to be listened to?), i am continually finding tons of shit i feel the "need" to buy. i have literally cancelled plans because i wanted to have a listen at the original black sabbath box set i bought earlier in the day. fuck, dudes are right. i am weird.

watch this:

anyyyyyyway, as anti-pro-creation as i am, i really these two would've delivered the ultimate duet... a kid. totally would've oozed talent. or been completely useless. wait, it wouldn't have been american, so i'm gonna go with the former... unfortunately, rumour has it that the only biological present that nick the stripper ever gave the lovely polly jean was herpes. moral of the story: don't do dudes in bands, or you'll wind up getting some nasty shit. doesn't matter how cool they are.

long time gone

2007-06-18T21:36:00.000-07:00

so, i've been gone and busy. which is why i haven't updated.

i just moved to hollywood proper, and i finally got a new job. yeah, i work at amoeba. no, i can't get you cool shit for cheap. unless i like you. which i probably don't. whatever.

i've been spending all my money on music, nothing new there. seriously. lucky my new place is a hovel that allows me to afford such luxuries.

on another note, i'm bummed that sea level is closing. fuck echo park and the silverlake scene, btw.

how stoked am i that queens of the stone age are playing with eagles of death metal and the duke spirit? jesus christ, it's like a train of multiple orgasms. i'll tell you: REALLY FUCKING STOKED.

more later.

i'm not crying, it's just been raining... on my face

2007-06-07T18:45:00.000-07:00

lately this blog has been little more than me talking about lamely funny movies and east indian interpretations of popular singers and bands. i realize this is totally lame and probably only entertaining to me and maybe a few of my good friends. all 2 of them.

so, to break the stride, i've decided to bring it all back home by... posting about this awesome tv show i just saw: flight of the conchords.

yeah, seriously. but it's different this time! i swear. this one is actually about "the trials and tribulations of a two-man, New Zealand digi-folk band as they make their way in New York City." see? it's about music! kinda. whatever. i've got nothin' new to say. everyone knows i'm only listening to bob dylan right now, anyway.

as most of you (and by most, i mean a select few) know, i lived in new zealand in 2004 and did a bunch of cool shit. while there, i developed a great love for new zealand bands, films and culture in general.

so when i heard about the new hbo show "flight of the conchords" that stars jemaine clement and bret mckenzie, two new zealand "celebs" that i came to know and love during my stay down under, i naturally had to tune in and see if down was the new up. check it out:

binary solo! be sure to check out the full length episode here. it premieres june 17th. anyone got hbo and wanna tune in and invite me over?

and to those wondering about my futurama adventure, unfortunately, i can't talk about it, as i was sworn to secrecy by fucks, er, i mean fox since the last of the episodes won't be airing until 2009. all i can say is matt groening, you rule.

and yes, billy west, you and your voicing talents did contribute to a large portion of the reason why i turned out to be a completely corrupted product of the 90s. thanks again, dude!

look, no one knows yet

2007-06-06T15:34:00.000-07:00

man, i love the beatles!

i found this a while back and posted it on a few friends' blogs last year... i wanted to share it with all (3) of you who are reading this.

also, if you haven't seen the "indian thriller," please, please, please watch the following:

this really isn't a far cry from the original. i mean, c'mon. let's be honest, here.

good news, everyone!

2007-06-04T12:09:00.000-07:00

as previously mentioned, friday i went to the autolux/deerhoof show at the natural history museum in downtown la.

there, we spotted everyone from that one dude in nin to karen o of the yeah yeah yeahs to vincent gallo. and of course, the usual "hip" crowd of silverlake and echo park bohemian transients. museum + hyped indie rock bands = pretentious artistic types galore.

the show very different from their performance at the glass house in pomona a few weeks ago. this set was more along the lines of "ethereal aurual ambience" sprinkled with some new takes that they seemed to be experimenting with (hint: light on the vocals). eugene closed the show with "thanks for spending the past 45 minutes with us underwater." if you weren't there, you missed out! oh yeah, and to the dude who was recording the set with a 4-track... post that shit, already!

tonight i'm gonna go check out the burning brides kick off their month-long residency at the echo. it's free every monday in june starting at 9p so do yourself a favor and go. also, make sure you pick up their new album "hang love" out on june 19th when you're out grabbing the new white stripes cd "icky thump." check it ouuuuuut.

burning brides live in tex-ass on 03.26.05:

for those of you out of the indie-music loop, you may have heard/played the burning brides song "heart full of black" at some point on guitar hero. ...yeah. that's all i'm gonna say about that.

moving on... i've been watching futurama on dvd again. that show was amazing, why the hell was it ever cancelled? here's a clip from the episode "bendin' in the wind" (fuck yeah! dylan reference!).

tomorrow i get to go sit in on a cast reading for futurama. my friend joe matt knows the show's creators david x. cohen and matt groening pretty well, so he invited me to go along with him.

this goes without saying: my friends fucking RULE.

knock knock knockin' on heaven's door...

2007-06-01T16:22:00.000-07:00

usually, i wouldn't post about a movie unless it had to do with music or some shit (check out the new anton corbijn film "control" about joy division frontman ian curtis, for starters) or unless it was pretty fuckin' rad. but this is my god damn blog and i'm going to do whatever the fuck i want because no one is reading this shit anyway.

knocked up, judd apatow's latest blend of "comedic wit" and "heartfelt reality," isn't really either of the above forementioned things. it's good, though, and worth your money, with the exception of those graphic "the miracle of birth" shots. fuck dude, no one wants to see that shit! at least not me. whatever, the rest of the time it's pretty fuckin' funny.

check out this clip:

other highlights include a scene where actor paul rudd's character scores some 'shrooms from "a roadie for the black crowes." laced with musical references and hilarious canadian weed jokes, it's worth watching. plus, the dude from "undeclared" is in it and he's wearing a nin shirt in one of the scenes that i happen to also own. i always thought he was kinda cute in the super dweeby way, so his wardrobe stylist person/whatever gets props for that. fuck you, yeah, i still like and listen to nine inch nails.

and here's the trailer in cased you missed it:

annnnyywaaayyyyy, tonight i'm gonna go see autolux and deerhoof perform at the natural history museum downtown. it's gonna be rad. then i'll prolly hit up the raveonettes show at spaceland afterwards, if there's still time. if i miss it, there's always a chance to catch 'em when they play at the echo on june 8.

and yeah, surprise! i didn't post about dylan, but i still had to fit him in somehow... if you didn't catch the title of this post. oh yeah, and if you're ever in silverlake/los feliz check out the 4100 bar right at sunset junction.... there's an awesome jukebox selection with everything from sonic youth to guns 'n roses to dylan! fuckkkk yeahhhh!

john lennon, bob dylan and mary jane

2007-05-30T11:25:00.000-07:00

i'm back in hell, eh? now. yeah. nothing has changed, still listening to lots of dylan, still in isolation, still broke. it's pretty rad. gives me plenty of time to do what i wanna do.

a meeting of two great minds, and apparantly some green, in the back of a cab in london, circa 1966.

the audio is a kinda hard to understand, but check it out:

lennon always talked about how dylan "influenced" him...

is anyone going to the dylan show in costa mesa on july 26th? does anyone even read this god damn thing?

a complete unkown

2007-05-24T17:10:00.000-07:00

i've been awol in the middle of nowhere for the past week, 'cos i left LA in kind of a weird state of mind. i'll be back soon; all my stuff is there anyway. what i don't have is a job, direction, or any money, so it's kind of a bummer to think about going back right now. anyone wanna give me some or all of these things?

so in the mean time, i'm pretty much doing a whole lot of nothing but watching old concert bootlegs and listening to bob dylan and the doors, and taking lots of pictures of nowheresville. lots of rocks and jocks.

it's kinda rad, though, 'cos i picked up some great new (old) stuff. my mom gave me her old olympus camera that's like 35 years old, and in awesome condition. she also bequethed to me all her old vinyl records... which means first issue beatles, lennon, doors, dylan, johnny cash etc. FUCK YEAH. I've been sitting around having a quarter-life crisis and all i wanna do is just listen to original recordings on vinyl.

check it out...

so, yeah.

after hearing my mom geek out on old hippie tales about how she hung out backstage at the hollywood bowl back in 1968 with jim morrison, i got pretty stoked. who knew my mom was that fucking cool? yeah, dudes, i may be a dork, but my mom sure wasn't. back in the day, she knew how to go off!

check out "this is the end" from the doors: live at the hollywood bowl dvd. sucks that it only seems to be available on region 2 and hasn't seen an official us release. anyone know anything about this? anyway. watch as jim (super doped up), slays it live... with a 15 minute rendition!

part 1

part 2

yeah, my mom said that show was fucking rad. i'm inclined to agree with her.

dylan is my co-pilot

2007-05-17T16:49:00.000-07:00

lately, i've been on a huge dylan kick. not just a little "essential bob dylan," smattered with a helping of his "greatest hits," no, i'm talking all balls out, bootleg series, blood on the tracks and another side of dylan, etc. on-repeat. check out my "friends" i took with me to the joshua tree desert yesterday...

yeah. (click to see more pics from my trip to the desert)

so naturally when my friend (and fellow dylan enthusiast) lionel sent me a link of weird al yankovic parodying dylan, i had to watch:

i'm not a huge "weird al" fan, 'cos his stuff is usually pretty lame, but this kinda floored me. i mean, fuck. it's spot on, hilarious, and it combines my love of dylan, palindromes and folk music. it just keeps on getting better and better.

anyway, i'm going back to watching the copy of "no direction home" that my friend joe matt just got me for my birthday. fuck yeahhhhh.

i sold my soul

2007-05-16T10:03:00.000-07:00

not that i was all gung-ho about the new manson album "me me me me" or whatever the fuck it's called (i'm sure it's something as equally as pretentious), but being a fan of the 1996 classic "antichrist superstar," i feel at least slightly inclined to check out his newer shit. even though i have been disappointed. repeatedly.

anyway, i just watched manson "revisit" (see also: rip off) his past by "eclectically sampling" (see also: hacking) from the following films and music videos:
- david lynch's "lost highway"
- stephen king's "carrie"
- nine inch nails' "starsuckers, inc."
...and even his own "(s)aint" video.

seriously. get over yourself, dude. it's called "coming up with something new." or better yet, not at all. let's face it: you're over. and frankly, you're starting to remind me a bit of pre-butterball robert smith (and not in the good way. we all know where that fucker ended up).

back to the video, though. nowadays, it wouldn't be a real goth video if it didn't feature a bunch of topless suicide girls, so of course, there's a whole roomful. oh yeah, and let's not forget the ridiculous amounts of gratuitous blood-bath sex between him and goth-lolita girlfriend evan rachel wood. we get it, dude. you're banging a famous teenager. that's totally gonna last.

pushing the envelope? nah, more like rehashing the envelope. i'm over it.

it's my party...

2007-05-15T12:02:00.000-07:00

tomorrow, i'm turning 21. staying typical to 20-year-old angst that didn't wane with the loss of my teen years, i'll be spending the entire day alone. kinda by choice, kinda not. i've already managed to piss off a bunch of people here in hollyweird, and i'm pretty indifferent about the whole thing. besides, birthdays have never been the balls-out event for me that they have been for everyone else. another year, whatever. at least now i don't have to use a fake id to see most of the shows i wanna go to. i don't drink, so it's not gonna be drunkfest 5000 over here, but i will prolly go to a couple of bars just 'cos i can now. anyone know of a place where the gin is cold but the piano's hot? and by gin i mean coca-cola. and by piano, i mean jukebox. yeah, i'm square.

in celebration of my upcoming non-birthday, i've decided to post a fucking rad promo video of "nick the stripper" by none other than nick cave and the birthday party. watch as nick goes off at some pre-burning man bon fire rave.

they don't make music videos like this anymore. oh yeah, and fuck you, mtv.

...and in case you were wondering what nick cave is up to these days, he's in a sick new band called grinderman, which features current members of the bad seeds. it's pretty rad, 'cos their website featured the "grinderman podcast" which is a series of recording fragments from the band's writing sessions.

check out this awesome clip of them performing "honey bee (let's fly to mars)" live on bbc2's later... with jools holland on may 11.

yeahhhhhh, he's still got it, 25 years later.

their debut self-titled album is OUT NOW. check it out. seriously. no, i'm serious. do it. now. go. seriously.

lollapa-loserville

2007-05-14T12:28:00.000-07:00

okay, so the lollapalooza festival has been trying for years to recreate what it once was back in the early ninties... back before emo, screamo, shitmo, whatever you wanna call it. back when "depressing teenagers was like shooting fish in a barrel" and their medication was the original carnations of the smashing pumpkins, sonic youth, nine inch nails and nirvana. not any of these new band lineups. if you were there and you saw 'em back then, rad. if not, you're outta luck. leave the bands alone, and someone tell billy corgan to keep his dick out of the sacks of money. let it go. without james iha and d'arcy, the band is NOT THE SMASHING PUMPKINS. it's just another shitty billy corgan zwan-nabe mash up.

back on track... lollapalooza is and has been for the past, oh, 10 years, just a new way to leak thousands of dollars from the willing hands of hapless teens who wanna "experience the music, man!" at a festival where the "vibe is real" and "just being there is saying something." tough news, dudes, you gotta be at glastonbury to experience a real festival. no second-rate us fest can even match up. how can they by charging $5 for a bottle or water or $10 for a beer, and setting up booths for spin magazine every ten feet? if you're not wading in other people's shit (literally), not showering for 1+ week(s), using cow manure as a pillow for your head (if you even do sleep), then you're not "keeping it real" at a festival. no amount of 'shrooms is gonna "transport you there." you missed it. woodstock is over (or at least any trace of what it was has been shot to fuck). this isn't the 70s. we're not in leeds. even the artists know it's a shit sandwich, as they're raping and pillaging the wallets of teens in a corporate setting under the guise of "indie music."

whatever, this is nothing new. as long as people are willing to shill out the money, corporate rise and capitalistic funding is just gonna keep thriving. blah blah blah. i'm all about supporting the music. i buy merch, i buy cd's (me and like, 12 other people in the world), and i consume whatever else gets handed out that i am mildly interested in. that's all part of it. i just can't say i approve of those $15 falafels at coachella.

anyway, lolapalooza is still trying to garner the attention of teens in the midwest who still listen to pearl jam and know who mia is... so they've created a pretty simple way of getting the culturally hip and tragically indie 18-35 year old demographic's attention. check out the rad little corporate ploy to help them advertise. you can upload your face from any picture and put it on a spindly character's body (of your design) and have them dance to interpol or whatever the fuck other indie-but-not-really band you want to... providing of course that they are playing this year at lollapalooza. stupid? totally. simple minded? definitely. soft-shelled corporate advertising? uh-huh. effective? absolutely. i've already made myself 5.

everyone's always said i look like karen o...

here's a couple of other ones i did of myself...

glowsticks make the rave, not the raver

contrary to popular belief, you CAN actually breakdance to sparklehorse

and some of my friends...

cartoonist and author of peepshow, joe matt...

my roommate likes wearing my clothes (seriously)...

and some people that it just looked funny to do it to...

aaron north really slays it whenever he listens to amy winehouse... btw, nice chicken costume, brah...

and while i'm at it, might as well do the other half of buddyhead...

fat chicks love that dude from dfa

if you wanna make one yourself and didn't catch the link above, go to paloozahead.com and have fun sucking your life away for the next 6 hours, 'cos that's what i did...

i have the sense of humor of a 12 year old.

i'm sorry girl, but that ho was me...

2007-05-13T11:44:00.000-07:00

it's not a secret that r. kelly's hip-hopera "trapped in the closet" is one of my favorite movie musicals ever. fuck that, it's probably one of my favorite movies ever period. even lucasfilm super-fan jeordie white (ak/a twiggy ramirez) stated "this is better than star wars!" upon his first viewing of the now classic cult flick. truer words were never spoken.

since it's initial release upon the world back in 2005, the phenomenon known as "trapped in the closet" has spread faster than hepatitis c at a tattoo convention. even my mom has seen it and asked "is this for real?" yes, mom, it's all real. or maybe it isn't. is r. kelly so completely absurd and out of his mind to think that this is what we as cinematic movie-goers want to see? or do we really want to believe that this man is so witty and intelligent that he created this all as a joke? the world will never know. what we do know, however, is that it's amazing, and nothing quite like it has even been created before, and anything since is just a cheap hack of the original. everyone from the upright citizen's brigade theater to weird al himself has parodied this defining piece of r&b music video achievement.

here's the kicker, though, what we've seen so far is only the first half of this amazing story. yes, never fear, while we were all left on the edge of our seats at the end of chapter 12... it's been reported that the second half of this pop culture staple will be release sometime in july of this year. check the trapped in the closet wiki for more info.

anyway, while you patiently wait for part two to continue forth with it's operatic tale of sex, lies, and midgets, check out r. kelly's you tube video channel. with (almost) daily updates from the guru of water sports and underage girls himself.

here's my personal favorite in which r. kelly explains his forthcoming album, "double up"'s intended incarnation as "makin' babies." check out the chick in the background braidin' his corn rows. she really looks like the last thing she wants to be doing is fixing up his skanky ass weave.

unbe-WEAVE-able.

hair, beer, and babes. get into it.

2007-04-16T21:48:00.000-07:00

stuck in the metal. you figured it out: i'm all about music. and what's better than music? metal music. it's like hookers. amazing. fucking awesome. the only thing better than hookers are more hookers... with blow.

recently, i discovered a rather increasingly popular cult gem that could be described as the blow on the hooker called "heavy metal."

picture this. 1986. judas priest. dokken. beer. chicks. a man in a spandex zebra onesie. put this together and you have quite possibly, the best rock and roll documentary ever created. it's 15 minutes of pure ecstacy. and now it's out on dvd for everyone to view. dave grohl calls it "basically rock and roll 101." and he's fucking right.

the special features on the dvd include the sequel "neil diamond parking lot." bunch of middle aged moms drinking diet coke and talking about how kentucky woman changed their lives. enough said.

heavy metal parking lot.

15 minutes of dudes with crazy hair, hardcore metal chicks raving about how great dokken is while chugging back cases of bud light in the parking lot before the show. fuck yeah! tailgating! here's the entire thing, split up into two parts. it's worth watching again and again and again, so do yourself a favor and pick it up.

part one:

part two:

i was born in the wrong decade.

starting out with nothing

2007-03-08T12:01:00.000-08:00

the new nine inch nails album, year zero, is scheduled to hit stores on april 17. big surprise: this means more touring. since 2 years straight didn't cut it in '05/'06, they have to make sure that they literally visit every single city on the face of the earth. multiple times (check out the 4 shows in a row in london that started last night). yeah, dudes. bunch of wankers in the uk really want to hear a middle aged dude hopped up on 'roids singing "i wanna fuck you like an animal" for FOUR NIGHTS IN A ROW. hot. with all the "leaks" that are going off at each and every show, by the time the time the new album is set to release, no one is going to bother even buying it since they got that shit months ago. i'm sure trent has grandiose plans for this whole ninspiracy web that will entice all those 17 year old obsessive fan boys with boners for conspiracy theories and x-files fan fic sites into buying more records, but the rest of the world (see also: 35 year old jocks) just want another "head like a hole" track they can listen to really loudly when they are "angry" and "workin' on their truckz."

help bring tits back. start using it by casually putting it into your every day conversations. like when you find out the jesus and mary chain are reuiniting to work on recording their new studio album in nearly a decade and playing coachella to boot. or when you find out that the scummy drummer from that local band really didn't have herpes after all, and that really is just razor burn. or you can edit funny shit on popular wikipedia pages just because you think it's funny. tits, dude.

speeeeeeaaaaaaaaakkkkkkkkinnnnnnnngggggggg of which... tits totally describes the starlite desperation. playing on 03.04 at cafe du nord in san francisco, their shit went off. those dudes know how to put on a show. it's a refreshing change to see a band that isn't afraid to tear up the stage on a sunday night. starlite desperation drummer jeff ehrenberg brought some powerful backing to the skins, friendily competing for the audience's attenion with lead singer and guitarist dante adrian. how often do you see chemistry like that? you know it's good when the drummer can tear your eyes away from the lead singer and white hot bass player (hethur suval) for more than 10 seconds. towards the end, dante floored the audience by dropping on all fours and screeching loudly into his guitar to create a hendrix-like feedback effect during one of the songs. bottom line: go see 'em next time they're playing, on march 31 at the troubadour in los angeles. and add them to your myspace, put 'em on your top 8 and blog about it or post bulletins or whatever the fuck it is you do when you find out about cool stuff and want to tell all your friends. seriously. DO IT!!! these guys deserve more buzz.

army of anyone's new single has literally failed to impress anyone. why? because they SUCK. no one wants to hear your whiny voice sing more power-pop 90s alt-rock ballads, richard. and doesn't matter how many salads you eat, if you keep chowing on all the sausage, your waistline is gonna go.

speaking of bands no one cares about, linkin park has begun working on a new album. and it's not even a hybrid monster love child of jay-z and chester bennington meshing such hits as i'm really mad, but not mad enough to curse because that would mean i'd lose my pre-teen fanbase record sales and i'm gonna retire and then make a comeback every other year to boost my sales. they've taken a new direction by hiring everyone's favourite vegan producer, rick rubin. under his advice they have dropped the rap-rock bull. wait, you mean they're dropping everything they've based their entire careers on to "break out of the box?" sorry dudes, you can't break out of your boxes unless you get sex changes. no matter what, you'll still be pussies. i'd tell you more but i really just don't give a shit.

ashlee simpson may not have stolen your boyfriend, but jeffree star, androgenous cross-dressing kink-tranny pin-up for today's emo-rave youth culture sure fucking did. he/she/it called lindsay lohan a cunt at the peaches show at the avalon on 12.13.06. yeah, i realize that was a little while ago, but whether or not that was a compliment or a burn still remains to be seen. what doesn't need any more clarification are the fucking whiny little bitches i saw running in and out of the bathroom every 10 minutes, totally tripping because "OHMIGOD LINDSAY LOHAN IS HERE. I CAN'T MEET HER LOOKING LIKE THIS." don't worry about it, she's probably so cracked out that she thought she was at her AA meeting. good for her. 12 steps... to the bar, baby!

and while i'm at it... someone tell the band whitey that it's okay to move around more than six inches during your set. "your own personal bubble" doesn't apply to the rules of rock 'n roll, dudes. if you're going to dress like pete doherety, at least don't fully rip the dude by completely destroying all his beliefs in hedonism by being stage pussies.

finally, stalk your boyfriend/girlfriend/fuck buddy by tracing his/her/its cell number using gps tracking. totally free and anonymous. word has it they're with your mom. click here.